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July
7, 2005
I ache for the ‘now’…that space between the notes
…that emptiness beneath all the words.
My body longs to feel it, and then my mind ‘notices’..
I fear its vastness, and its boundary-less-ness.
I run from it and escape into thoughts and ideas….
…into describing it
…talking ‘about it’ instead of feeling it.
It might overwhelm me
…I’ll drown !
…I’ll lose ‘me’, so I jump into the canoe of ‘ego’
and paddle for shore.
What shore? Don’t know !
Which direction? Don’t know !
To find YOU…in YOUR ‘ego canoe’.
Your canoe seems safer than mine….
at least it’s prettier
and seems more solid.
And you seem to know where you’re going…
you must know the road
because you’re paddling so fast.
And you don’t “look like you’re drowning” !
Are you?
O, God…what if you are as lost as me?
Wilbur I. Smith
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